“No appointable”
In 2004, Desert Island Discs host Sue Lawley quizzed him on his methods, to which Dacre responded: "Shouting creates energy, energy creates great headlines."
As Ofcom balked at doing the government’s bidding, and for whatever reason declined to appoint Paul Dacre as satrap of the broadcasting regulator, a look at other instances where similar foresight could have saved the TV industry a whole lot of bother.
Regarding Dacre, one does wonder though whether any of the Ofcom board had read this 2012 snippet from The New Yorker: “because Dacre tends to refer to underlings as ‘c*nts’, the daily meetings are known as the Vagina Monologues”.
In the crazy world of TV there are a few fair instances of dodgy choices for senior roles which could have been seen from the off, rather than the much-maligned retrospective view of Captain Hindsight.
Michael Grade's ill-fated return to ITV ('the red-socked television impresario walked into its headquarters in London's Gray's Inn Road, staff left their desks in the hope of a glimpse of the returning hero and burst into a spontaneous cheer when he appeared') as supposed saviour of the beleaguered broadcaster was occasioned by the dismal performance of then ITV programming supremo Simon Shaps.
Granada apparatchik Shaps achieved his long-craved ambition to be ITV Director of Programmes, only to reveal a distinct lack of creative moxie when he greenlit a slew of epically crap shows (Rock Rivals, Harley Street, The Palace, poaching Trinny & Susannah etc).
But Grade really screwed the pooch when he chose to be the 'managing chairman' at ITV, gunning for the dead-in-the-water Shaps, but seemingly without the nous to possess an actionable roadmap out of the morass. His hands-on role also acted to deter any talented executives wishing to take the post of programming head.
After the bumptious baron cratered ITV’s share price, he was forced to relinquish his dominance and let steady hand Peter Fincham crack on with the work of bringing the broadcaster back from the financial and creative cliff edge.
In retrospect, to the appointment of Entwistle as BBC Director General looked doomed from the start; the bookish Penfold lookalike really didn’t have the low cunning or sheer unhinged oddball quality of many DGs, witness his predecessor Mark Thompson (to paraphrase Hall & Oates "Oh here he comes. Watch out boy he'll chew you up. He's a man-biter").
Of course, the task of cleaning out the BBC's post Savile Augean Stables was assigned to the next DG, Tony 'Head Prefect' Hall.
Well, we know now, the BBC didn't exactly display the wisdom of Solomon in that choice. Presumably if the BBC Trust had the curiosity to ask about Hall's involvement in the Bashir affair, Tone might also have been 'not appointable'.
Least we forget, Hall was also DG when the premature decision to take BBC3 off the air was made.
There are many others (such as Andy Duncan at Ch4) who could easily be seen to have been operating on the Peter Principle and been grotesquely over-promoted, but one industry stalwart springs to mind.
Dawn Airey began her career at Central Television and achieved enough success to progress to a senior post at Grade’s Channel 4.
So, it made sense (of a sort) when she was appointed Director of Programmes at yet-to-be-launched Channel 5 in 1996. Where Airey cursed the whole enterprise with the "films, football and f*cking" mantra which took Channel 5 years to live down.
This, together with a phenomenally weak schedule (including Jack Doherty weeknights, Family Affairs and Keith Chegwin‘s c*ck) would have put paid to the career of many an aspiring TV executive.
Indeed, who can forget the last words of popstar/actor Adam Faith: "Channel 5 is all shit, isn't it? Christ, the crap they put on there. It's a waste of space".
But our Dawn continued to wend her merry way, with a promotion to C5 CEO, then decamping to Sky before helping set up the disastrous 8-day wonder Iostar, saved by Grade with a gig at ITV, rancorously departing after a short 8-month stint (thanks Mike!), returning to C5, thence to hand it over to the tender mercies of Richard Desmond for a rock-bottom price. Way to go Dawn.
Some lauded her atypically (for the industry) forthright manner, but others saw contrived coarseness and vulgarity unbecoming of a Cambridge graduate and former member of the Board of the British Library.
Still, after so many senior roles (most recently at Getty Images) I guess having a personal ‘brand’ matters, at least to some, more credulous employers. And why not? One can’t help but admire Airey’s chutzpah, however reluctantly.
Lastly…not a TV executive, but a familiar face in the industry, The Apprentice’s Alan Sugar.
The life peer’s years long habit of foul-mouthed tweeting should surely have made him the recipient of his own tiresome 'You're Fired!' catchphrase, which, btw, he didn't even come up with...making it even more pathetic.
If you have ever come across Sugar at any TV events, you will no doubt be aware that his reputation for personal charm and courtly manners is entirely merited.
And as for the Ofcom gig; if the government want to pursue a Dacre-style direction, Kelvin MacKenzie is probably available…you never know, he may even bring News Bunny along to cut some capers and enliven tedious board meetings.
